THE RECEPTIONIST: Another Day in the Life

Day two of the week feels like day 2000 in hell. Work people have the tendency to just get at that last nerve you have left and screw around with it until it catches fire and burns you the hell up. What was I thinking, working in an office?! I am an artist! These people see you working your behind off and will still obnoxiously interrupt you to say something pretentious and ignorant, with the authority of a king, and wait for you to bow a few times, shine their shoes while you're down there, and quiver in their presence once you stand again. Don't you dare make eye contact. You are a peasant. LOL Okay so now that I've gotten that off my chest. Let me tell you what happened today. It was a a busy day at the office. Calls were coming into the switchboard left and right. Guests were fighting amongst themselves to be next in line. Both of us Receptionists were on top of things...Ida Rose and I.  As things finally started to calm down, a lone man walked up to the front des...

Is it me? There seems to be an unwritten, but thoroughly upheld, rule in offices that you do not--by any means--think it's okay to befriend someone who has not tried to befriend you. I have recently learned that smiles are all fine and good but many people react as if you say something to them, then you've overstepped a major boundary...especially if you are subordinate to them. The nerve.  "How dare you take on an ounce of familiarity that was never offered to you? Oh wait! Perhaps you thought that because I walk past your desk and smile and say hello and good morning...perhaps you thought that because I have discussed my wedding plans...sports games...bar nights out...that you could tell me I look tired and to take care of myself. JUST WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? You're just the Receptionist and yes, I can come and talk to you but don't you dare talk to me ! Your job is to smile and nod. I'm offended. " This is what happened, and I promise you, you can...

I am one whose nerves are now easily agitated thanks to my decision to work in public service jobs where there a re plenty of people to work them.  There are numerous things that now annoy me and this account is but one.      There is a stomper in my office.  This young woman, alone, sounds like a heard of elephants ascending and descending the cement staircase in front of my desk.  When she walks past, you can't help but imagine spiders and roaches and all sorts of other creepy crawlies that must be in her path causing her to stomp them to death with every step she takes.  I've nicknamed her "Stampy" in full homage to Bart Simpson's elephant who walked through his neighborhood destroying everything he came in contact with.  I often hear her before I see her and turn to my colleague and say, "Here comes Stampy again."  My co-worker thinks it's hilarious.  What really gets me is that she is as thin as a rail. I mean deathly, starving-loo...

If I'm being honest, today wasn't a bad day, as many of them have been. Today was quite normal actually which is why this guy stood out from all others, I suppose.  I call him "the speller" because he spelled everything to me.  As I sat there, I was trying to figure out if he thought I was dumb or if he was trying to convince himself that he wasn't.  Or, maybe he thought I was cute and wanted to impress me with his high IQ.  Who knows.  The conversation went like this:   Me: "Hi. Who are you here to see?"   Him: "Marvin David. D.A.V.I.D."  (I paused and smiled at him to see if he was seriously spelling David to me. He was. I acknowledged what he said and went on.    Me: "Okay. What is your last name?"   Him: "Robert Smith. R.O.B.E.R.T. S.M.I.T.H" (Okay first of all I said last name...  I thought to myself, why is he spelling these easy names to me? I looked around to see if there was a hidden camera somewhere and paused to...

I should begin this thing by first admitting to you and to myself, although guardedly, that I probably don’t have the best attitude about this Reception job anymore do to the abundant idiotic interactions forced upon me due to my subservient standing in this company. I was always under the (unfortunate) impression that most people, I’ll pick a number and say 80 percent, would naturally respect someone who is kind and intelligent, hard-working, and helpful. Just as disastrous was my belief that at least half of the remaining 20 percent would come over to the winning side—the side with me on it—once they got to know this charming person and saw her smile. (Still talking about me.) I should also confess early on that hardly anything anyone can say in response to whatever I write in this website of personal experiences will be a necessary conversion factor…if the intention is to remind me about peace, love, and humanity. On the contrary, the main purpose of this blog is simply...